| How Losing Face Can Change Your Life |
| Written by Olga Sheean | |||
Two things, according to Dõv Baron, who is speaking from painful experience. Firstly, everything you knew to be you - all values, beliefs, behavioral patterns - is destroyed and, secondly, in rebuilding your shattered self, you realize how only a close shave with death could have woken you up from the stupor which you called reality. Dõv Baron thought he was indestructible. Bungy jumping and free climbing were the adrenaline - pumping thrills he needed in order to really feel alive. Although a successful psychotherapist and speaker at the time of his death defying fall in 1990, Dõv needed to know that there was more to life; his reckless, seemingly carefree pursuits were his attempt to find the ultimate fulfillment - the missing 'something.' "I may have fallen off a mountain," admits 37 - year - old Dõv, "but it was really more a pedestal. When my face smashed to pieces by the fall, I had to dissociate from the ego presence which it represented and so, without a face - and without an ego - I had to question who I really was underneath." The fall, which resulted in horrific disfigurement and physical debilitation, prevented Dõv from giving vent to his rebellious nature through his usual dare-devil activities. Instead he was forced to lie quietly, look inwards and ponder why his life had come to such a screeching halt. Now, four years and several massive surgical operations later, Dõv is widely acclaimed for his 'crazy rebel wisdom,' and irreverent humour. Dubbed the 'Robin Williams of Enlightenment,' he has taught many how to laugh in the face of change, and how to give up the myriad of excuses most humans use to avoid leading a fuller, and more authentic life. And to those who seem to have everything, but are still looking for that elusive 'something,' he teaches one of the most important lessons learnt from his fall - when you are who you really are, then you are truly wealthy. "Many of us lead a life of numbing mediocrity because of the one, all - consuming addiction in this society," says Dõv. "That addiction is approval. Parents, peers and society tell us what we need to do in order to gain approval (love), and so we do it, thereby surrendering all our sense of self and authenticity. Instead, we need to get in touch with our own inner rebel; then we are willing to break the rules, and to be honest and creative." To be truly authentic, says Dõv, one must also be prepared to experience oneself in a more than just one channel. A person may be happy being a legal secretary, for example, but has he/she discovered the dancer within? Through his humourous, maverick approach to life, Dõv helps others break free from their mould by enabling them to strip away the layers which have been built up around the self - part of the role, or 'script,' imposed by parents in society. "We are largely moulded by our three basic needs - nutrients, stimulants and love," says Dõv. "From birth, we reach out for these three things and the way in which they are met determines how we interpret them throughout life." For example, if a child is not getting enough love, he/she may be taught to misbehave in order to get attention. Once this attention is given, even if it is a reprimand, the child perceives that it has been given love and so begins to develop a distorted concept of what real love is. Later in life he/she may find it quite normal to be in abusive relationships as a result of this need not being met in a healthy, loving way. "You don't get what you deserve in life," says Dõv. "You get what you believe you deserve. The energy emitted by a human being's thought processes is a magnetic force which attracts similar energy - whether negative or positive. We need to focus on the positive, not the negative, in order to change our vibration. If we focus on what we don't want, we often end up getting it." Although many of us may have come to believe that we are human beings trying to have a spiritual experience, we are, in fact, spirit trying to have a human experience. To do this, we were given emotions, which become the key to understanding the mind, body, - and ultimately - spirit. Many of Dõv Baron's unusual and perceptive insights into life are reflected in his fiction novel about a character called Elvis Richards. In The Fall and Rise of Elvis Richards, Dõv tells a story similar to his own, with the addition of an eccentric and magical character called Magid (meaning angel). Provoking Elvis to see his shallowness and negativity of his life before his mountain-climbing accident, Magid helps him re-evaluate all his preconceived ideas. "Who is the script writer in your life?" Maggid asks. He forces Elvis to see how he affects others around him and how his own behavior or thoughts determine how others react to him. "Every person, place, or thing is energy," Maggid reminds him, and so it is important to be aware of what frequency one vibrates. "If you don't know hot to get energy, how can you celebrate? If you don't celebrate, you never know how to find energy." The spiritual conundrums become clear to Elvis and he finally returns to his life as a hairdresser - but with a very different outlook. "I Believe in ethos - the Greek term for being thoroughly intoxicated with God and life," says Dõv. "Getting in touch with that becomes the propelling force to health and success in every area of life. We must be willing to listen to our heart and body - and to examine and act upon what we feel, rather than taking aspirin to suppress whatever pain we may experience. "I'm not here to teach, but to inform, share, remind and stimulate, using high-powered information and the strong emotional impact of laughter. So I don't want to be put up on a pedestal. I remember what happened last time I got up on one of those." From From Shared Vision Magazine |
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